01:10.

"Going on from that place, he went into their synagogue, and a man with a shriveled hand was there. Looking for a reason to accuse Jesus, they asked him, "Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?"

He said to them, “If any of you has a sheep and it falls into a pit on the Sabbath, will you not take hold of it and lift it out? How much more valuable is a man than a sheep! Therefore it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath.”

Then he said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” So he stretched it out and it was completely restored, just as sound as the other. But the Pharisees went out and plotted how they might kill Jesus."
- Matthew 12: 9 - 13

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Imagine that - You are without an arm.

You have one good arm, and one stump where the other is supposed to be.

You are in the synagogue, the temple, the church. Along came this man so many have been whispering about. With him is a crowd of the most well-known teachers of the temple. You looked at the scene before you, just like every one else around you. Suddenly, one of those teachers - you recognised he is important because of his robes and the phylacteries on his forehead and left arm - glanced at you and walked over, jabbing his fingers at you.

All eyes turn to you.

The man pointed at your stump of an arm.

"Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?" The whole group of teachers asked the only one among them not adorned in robes or wearing phylacteries.

You felt embarassed. All of them were looking at your handicap. And all around you, even without looking up, you knew that every other boy and men in the temple were staring at you. You felt a blush of shame come on and lowered your head, in case any one sees.

Then He spoke.

"Stretch out your hand."

And for some reason, you stretch out your stump of an arm. You didn't know why. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw one of the teachers flinch disapprovingly at the shriveled mess of tissues that you proffered at the One some said is the Messiah. You look at that same sight, the lack of your limb, the source of much emotional pain and more tears than you care to admit.

You don't know why you proffered that stump.

Why would a disabled man offer his disabled arm when someone says to stretch out his hand? Wouldn't stretching out the good hand be the natural reaction? That other hand has nothing to hide, no shame and could actually obey any instructions this Jesus might ask. This good hand is the hand that he used to do every thing day to day. The stump... is no good. It cannot do... any thing. Yeah sure, he can use the stump to push little objects about sometimes but that's nothing, nothing compared to what proper arms can do, and there's no way he wants any one to see the emphasis of his handicap if he is to attempt to use the stump.

The stump... he just wants to forget. Not have every one stare at it. But here we are, for some reason, between him and the only man in the room looking at him without pity or scorn is this... his outstretched stump.

And as every one looks at this part of him that has only ever been a hinderence, the shriveled hand grew and filled out.

Suddenly, he was whole.

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What God wants is your hurt, your disability, your pain. He wants you to hold it out. Not hide it away. 'cause He wants to make you whole again.

What would it take you to stretch out your stump?

Do you want to be healed? Or have you got comfortable with that perpetual hurt, sin in your life? Won't you just trust me... He's not going to laugh at your injury, He's not going to scorn your tears, He's not going to ignore you like so many have done so before.

He wants to change your life.

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Pastor Reggie Dabbs was at City Church today and he touched on the above scripture. I never saw the significance of that man's stretching out his disabled arm as opposed to the healthy one. It never dawned on me - how hard it is to show your lack to God yet this unnamed man did.

Sometimes, responding to an altar call, confiding in a friend, crying during worship... all these stuff we avoid. Just in case people, or worst God sees the fullness of your inadequacy.

Sod people. God is not going to condemn you. He wants to make you whole. He wants you to want Him to make you whole. And honestly, as for people's stares and what-nots, most are preoccupied with their own problems. Others have the same problems as you. And whoever judges you, you can ignore, because we all have to answer to the same God one day.

If you are in right with the King of Kings, you are in right. Sod people.

I was at the altar today. Had to lay down something that would keep me looking back at Melb otherwise, and had to choose to let go of something in Sg that I probably have to face when I go back.

As I sobbed away during worship at how hard every thing seems, He said - and I am blogging this so I will remember always when I read my posts - the Lord Almighty, my King and Saviour, Lover of my soul and my Tower of Refuge said,

"Remember I have a call on your life."

Because You are in charge and You are Love and I can trust You, so I let go. So I lay bare my wound. So I respond.

My God is big....