20:15.

An hour ago, I took a stroll downstairs to Vista Point to grab an international calling card. The evening sky was casting blue over every thing and person and a gentle breeze was going. Every time there are moments like these, I wished R a y's here to experience evenings in Singapore, to experience Sg.

Now he has :) And knowing that he will do so again makes me smile and be everything non-blue.

Feb 9 to 15. Feb 15 to 21. R a y and S k y e's Sg and Msia trip, 2006. How good is it to have a God who makes every thing go so right and so well. That God gave us this love to enjoy and live out. And that yes, we finally did the three countries thing :) I finally saw where R a y stays, where he studied, the little hill where you rode your bike, where you eat, 1U. You finally seen my church, my home, the mrt, the places I go to.

And even more than that, we finally seen each other's parents.

That's a biggie which praise God, went so very well. It felt right, somehow, being there, staying at their home. As right as it felt when r a y was here, staying here at our home. It felt right and good and natural, a perfect fit and the way it is... talking to his folks, seeing him talk with my folks, laughing till we all had tears in our eyes - you, me and my mom - around the coffee table in the living room =)

Heh.

It's just so sweet to be able to do all that we did. Even just walking to the kopitiam nearby to have dinner was gorgeously beautiful or being at Kayu eating that huge roti tissue, I loved it. Everything was so sweet.

Our first Valentine's too :) in that Changi bungalow which harks back to colonial times. I love our walks at the boardway. I love every bit of those three days, two nights, I love how you held yourself and interacted and laughed with my extended family and family, I love you for being you. Finding Jacob's Cafe too was a gem, quaint little cafe run by down-to-earth type folks who displayed scripture in the window, all around and in the restroom, heh.

And I love the Valentine's Day presents, dear. You are sweet :)

We have come so far. I'm continuously thankful and glad and in love :)

I returned to Sg on the 21st, a Tuesday, exactly two weeks since my last day of work. We are going to make the decision as to where to be really soon, or rather, to just obey what we hear from God.

Sometimes, I get little episodes of freak out-ness. But rather than dwell on the odd feeling of not being a journalist any more or not knowing my next step, I rather feel freed to do God's work with my every day time. Not to say I don't falter but I am pressing on, continuing to press in to take hold of what God has for me, for us, and I'm not going to look backwards in any manner that would make one pull a Lot's wife. The goal is ahead. The present is here. The past, I am beyond thankful for. You will never know how much I struggle with certain letting-gos but always and forever, may it be that I, that we, press on to take our future.

There were many times in years darker when I sat on my bed, rode on the MRT, sat in church or just was somewhere doing something normal and inside of me, I wondered: "What is abundant life? What does it really mean? How do we have it? Jesus, You said that You came to give it and I believe You want to give it to us. What is it then? How do I do this?"

I believe You are showing us more and more of what it means. And Lord, we want to know, we want to see, we want to live in Your Glory.

There's nothing better than living for You
than saving my world with You
There's nothing better
than praising Your Name
than lifting my hands
I want to spend forever standing in Your Presence

I want to show You what You mean to me, Lord
Lord I give You my whole life
I got to tell You I'm Yours forever
Lord I give You my whole life

Jesus I will live for You
In everything I do
I'm holding onto You
Always
Always and Forever

Always. Always and Forever.


And we are doing this together.