22:34.

There are moments when it seems I am estranging myself from what has become my norm. Whether this is a draw-back-because-I'm-leaving or my-head-is-too-noisy-and-I-don't-have-the-words-to-tell-you-about-what's-going-on knee-jerk reaction, I am - you guess it - not too sure.

I have dug my heels in and refused to turn back, I want to run the final lap and grab as much as I can but tomorrow seems to hold my heart, and he is treating it like a wooden heart that is not supposed to feel or react.

I turned my attention to yesterday and tried considering the possible results if I had not gone down the paths I have. I dare not imagine. Or rather, I cannot see it any other way. Maybe studying what I did and do and being in these endeavours have made my mind a lot more complicated but I rather be this way than to never had known.

I rather be in the question than to never even be able to recognise there's an itch to scratch.

Hold me Jesus
'cause I am shaking like a leave
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace