19:37.

Pretty long entry, transcript from my journal, appearing here because while writing it in the early hours of the morning, I was seized with a feeling of revelation and clarity, scribbling everything furiously. Without ego or self pride, I am convicted there are God stuff here that is worth something good. Thus hey ;) it is worth a read. Cheers.

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Sharing with Ray just now about something that struck me and stayed in my mind’s eye from my June Melb trip till now.

Sat night then, at leadership with Glen Berteau, Ps Russell was launching into an almost tirade on stage, which eventually had the whole church clapping. But before anyone else started clapping, before the people showed their vocal agreement yet, Ps Sam – sat right at the front, about directly in front of her husband on the small stage – stood up.

She leapt to her feet and clapped and cheered. I couldn’t hear her from where I sat, about seven metres away a few seats away from being directly behind hers, but like her body language, I’m sure her words were of affirmation and encouragement (like “Come on” “Yeah, that’s right”) and her actions, words and the spirit of them prompted other people to clap and stand up till the whole theatre was cheering our senior pastor on.

What stayed with me was that stark image of her jumping to her feet, clapping, cheering. A fluid move which with its subsequent actions all together exemplified “not ashamed”.

It said – “I’m not ashamed to cheer for my man”

”I’m not ashamed to show appreciation, affirmation and encouragement to my man in front of so many people”

”I’m not ashamed of our love and how we feel, how proud I am of him, how I think he got it right”

And as a woman, the scene spoke to me on one more level…

”I’m not ashamed… of other people seeing me and thinking I’m a ‘yes’ woman or thinking I’m pandering to my man’s ego or that I’m sadly subservient”

[Men and women, that’s knowing who you are in Christ instead of falling to the fear of gender type judgement]

I told Ray this – I want that. I see myself and want to see myself being “not ashamed” of him or our love that way. Not ashamed to be… a cheerleader for my man.

By cheerleader, I don’t mean any of the fluff or the ra-ra stuff. I mean I want to cheer him on. I want to spur him on. I want to be there for him and affirm him and encourage him and say “come on”, believing in his God given potential and the things he can do for God through the greatness of Christ who lives in him.

Not ashamed to show I’m proud of him.

You know how out of politeness, people generally – perhaps Asians more so – tend to downplay our loved ones. Heck, but if someone makes a comment about my man, that I think it’s true like “he’s doing a great job in urban life” or even “he’s quite cute” :P well, I want to nod and say “yeahhhh, he is” (delivered in varied tones in answer to the two questions of course). I don’t want to be like, “hahaha, no lah, so-and-so is doing better” or “oh, you are being nice”.

Like no way. Don’t want. Lord help us not have that kind of attitude.

Iron sharpens Iron – That was something we were talking about even when he told me – and I, him – that I motivate him and inspire him. Well, he – Ray Chuah, that awesome man of God – motivates and inspires me.

[Disclaimer: Please rem and be assured that God is first in all things with us. That’s what we seek and have built our foundations on so far. Ultimately, God is the motivation and inspiration for us :) ]

Iron sharpens Iron.

We are called in this family in Christ to spur each other on, to love and exhort, to hold up and run with, sometimes to carry or be carried in times of need.

This is family. This is love. We are called to love. And in a romantic relationship, all these should be as alive as or even more alive in your intensity and devotion surely.

Iron sharpens Iron.

If I’m in a relationship where I call someone my boyfriend and he calls me his girlfriend but I’m not making any positive impact in his life then that’s totally wrong. It’s not meant to be that way! No!

Iron sharpens Iron.

When you take time and seek God’s heart for you before committing, you get iron to match your own. The scriptures say don’t be yoked with an unbeliever. The maximum of the potential of the wonders and good a relationship can do comes through in its right environment and setting when you are both on the same grounds – both on fire, both in love most with God, both not looking at a relationship because of casual need, both saying and asking oneself “how do I be the best for him/ her?” “God, am I the best for him/ her? Can I be?”.

That is love.

L. O. V. E

And I’m going to say it again – I love R a y m o n d C h u a h.

he is amazing :)

12.49am
08/08/05